Speaking of solipsism...

TodayI babysat for 3-year-old Thomas.

'And - and - and - we wanted to draw fake mustaches on, but then the police would come.'

'Why would the police come?'

'We're not supposed to draw on fake mustaches.'

'I don't think the police would come if you did that. I think your teacher might not like it, but the police wouldn't mind.'

'Yes they would.'

'No they wouldn't. The police are there to make sure you don't do anything to hurt yourself, or other people.'

(Punching himself in the head) 'Did you know, you can only hurt yourself?'

'No, you can hurt other people too.'

(Freezes) 'YOU CAN HURT OTHER PEOPLE?!'

'Yes.'

'But you can only hurt yourself, right?'

'No, you can hurt other people too. That's why you have to be gentle.'

'But you can hurt other people gently.'

Oh boy. Incidentally, during a lot of this I had 'Smokey Taboo' by Cocorosie stuck in my head, particularly the line 'It's true, I get depressed in fancy hotel rooms...'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wdxDV3qBq4o